The sequel on etiquette. Kids are taught ‘how to behave’ with patience and by example. But what exactly is socially desirable in the Netherlands?
We all know the basics, actually. A selection:
- Phone, tablet and TV are a ‘no-go’ during the meal.
- All meals are considered a social event. You ask permission to leave the table and you excuse yourself.
- Talking is fun but talking too much and inappropriate topics are not appreciated.
- Use at least 2 words when answering: “Yes, please”, “No, thank you”.
- Don’t start eating until everyone is served.
- Make eye contact when you speak to someone.
- Don’t point out other people’s children about their bad table manners. It’s not their fault but their parents.
- Don’t do anything you don’t want your child to copy: swearing, gossiping, etc.
When your child played with others or in a restaurant, you clean up together. A thank you is also in order because your child was allowed to play. The hospitality was given. Hospitality isn’t self-evident. You don’t use the bathroom while eating. (Unless there really is no other way.)
You thank for a present. Sending a card, message or a self-made drawing would be so thoughtful and appreciated when an immediate thank you wasn’t possible.
Pay attention to what is going well at the table. Give compliments. When tampering, you teach your child how to clean up after himself. It’s no big deal. Accidents like spilling really happen by accident.
True parenting is done at home. Take a closer look to your skills if you have to correct your child out loud in public…
Childcare in the Netherlands can be perceived as an extension of home. We co-raise your children, sort of speak. We too teach by example.
An interesting topic to discuss, as far as I’m concerned. It really got me thinking.
Sources: 24baby.nl / Oudervannature.nl / Trouw.nl / Oudersvannu.nl / pedagogicalondersteunen.org / wij.nl / plenty.com / jmouders.nl